Official site of Fast-Food Poet & Poet Laureate of the Principality of New-Utopia, Angus O'Mann.

Friday, April 29, 2005

To Rosaas: My inbox heart is empty

Rosaas, love:

I will do all I can to expedite.

Why have you not answered any of the questions in my last emails? I take these things very personally.


Beloved Rosaas:

I have contacted Mr. Zak, love.

But I need to know if you feel the same way about me that I feel about you. And I need to get a straight answer as to whether you are going to meet me in Spain or not.

And you were to send me a picture, which I have not received.

My suitcase is full but my heart is empty. Money does not salve all wounds when ones heart is ailing. I think Shakespeare said that.

Angus O'Mann
Your Poet Laureate


I have waited by my computer, and no matter how many times I hit "reload" I do not receive your reply. My inbox, like my heart, is empty.

I have complied with all the business requests of Peter Yak and Amino Asid, and have done what is asked. Is this all this is for you? A financial transaction? Do you not feel any other connection with me the way I feel for you? Does the electrical current flow in one direction alone?

You remain elusive as to whether you will meet me in Madrid. You said you did not have travelling papers, then you did. Are you toying with me and my emotions? I ask you questions, and you email without the answers. Business Business Business. I cannot take this emotional rollercoaster.

Once you have your treasure, will that be the end of our relationship? Will you leave me behind like a smelly piece of cod in the sun? Why do you not respond?


Thursday, April 28, 2005

Rosaas: Make haste

Dear Mr. Angus,

Good Morning to you and your entire family. I have read and understood your mail.

Have you contacted the office in Spain to inform them that you are my nominee and you intend to come and take delivery right there in Spain ?. Have you received the documents from the Attorney he told me that he sent the Power of Authority and the Deposit certificate to as I requested of him on Friday? Please I need confirmation from you today and also keep me inform on your arrangement as regards to your trip to Spain. I hope you can make the trip this week. But you have to get in touch with the contact person Dr. PETER ZAK , we have to make haste when the sun shine.

Have a nice day and look forward to meet you person soon.

Waiting to hear from you today.

Mrs. Savimbi.

Rosaas: Accelerated love

My dearest Angus,

You have again accelerated my love for you. I pray that you arrive Spain safely. I want to re-iterate that you should cooperate with them as you take delivery of the funds.

Idiomatic _expression: This is part of figures of speech (idiom). it is not an African but English language. Its means how deep I feel about you.

You have not at any time told me about swan. Like as I have told you earlier in my previous mail that Sex can not be ignore. I want to because it help to regulate the body and ease tension, mostly when you have the urge. Yes I do know what you mean by boner. It is an erected penis. It is called complete man.

I look forward to read from you while in Spain today. My love for you can be over emphasize I love you more than words can explain.

With best regards,

Your love. Rosaas

Wednesday, April 27, 2005

Rosaas: Intimate Emails (Rated R)

[Editor: These are intimate emails between Angus O'Mann and his "African Rose," Rosaas Savimbi, widow of the infamous Jonas Savimbi. Some of the following is not suitable for younger readers, such as the "Boner" discussion.]

Rosaas Savimbi wrote:

My Dearest Angus,

Good morning, I have read your mail with keen interest this morning. I have to thank you once more and give profound gratitude to almighty GOD for his mercies on us daily.

Rosaas: It was so good to hear from you! It made my day! And thank you for the explanations below! I will speak to each in red type.

I have read and understood your mail. I stand to answer your questions as they come. The word coughing and can not be hidden is just like idiomatic _expression. I mean you have been able to prove it to me that you love me and I can not pretend over that so it has become like coughing which you can not hide, so I love you.

I understand. You are a good teacher of language. If you teach me a little each email, we will speak fluently when we are together. People have told me that I have been much happier lately. I guess I have been coughing up my love for you and coughing more and more. I think I am so in love I have coughing bronchitis or pneumonia so srong are my feelings and so wide my smile. What is "idiomatic _expression"? Is that African for having a dumb or foolish look on your face?

Regarding my empty bed. It is a dream. I have repeatedly had this dream since the beginning of our communication and to be precise the second day you told me how you feel. about me (Love wise).

I have had a dream that keeps coming back about you. Did I tell you about the swan dream? I can't remember because I was, then I wasn't, then I was going to tell you. I'll look back at my emails and if I didn't I will tell you separately.

Regarding sexual ability, Yes am, I have told you that GOD blessed Africa women with all that its take to care for a well deserved man like you. I am capable of taking care of your sexual urge. I do not see sex as a bad thing. GOD almighty said in the Bible "Go to the world and multiply" Now how can this be without having sex with the opposite sex. Sex is a natural phenomenon that can not be ignore when you found the right person to do it with.

I agree! Sex can't be ignore... and why would you want to? I am saving myself for when we will be together. But I have to confess something, and I hope it is not offensive. Please take it as a compliment. I got a boner when I read your words about sex. Unlike other people in my church, I do not think the boner is an evil thing. I think the boner is righteous. I think it is a gift from God, an _expression of love, and a sign that the Lord does not want you to hide your love always, like coughing. Do you know what I mean by boner? Here we also call it a woody, a hard-on or a stiffy. Of course, I mean an engorged penis. What do they call them in Africa?

I warn you, I do have some different opinions on Christian religion. I am deeply religious and study the bible much. But I don't think the Lord wanted us to obey obey obey. I think the Lord wants us to Think Think Think! And challenge and disagree and try to figure things out on our own. Like I disagree with you about homosexuals. I think they are natural because God made them that way. Nobody decides to be homosexual. It's very hard to get laid when you're straight, who would want to make it more complicated, both courting and having to buy special gels and leather and stuff. Also, there's a place in the bible where God said "Go forth, be fruity and multiply."

But that's OK. We can "agree to disagree." And believe me, I'm not gay. Whoa, I just got another boner!

Regarding Dr. Zak, Yes he is, I am very confidence about his company's ability and reliability, he is reliable and trust worthy that informed his position presently. I want to re-iterate that you should endeavor to cooperate with them when you get to Spain. I hope and pray fervently to GOD that you are aware of how important you are to my life now.

Do not worry, my love. I won't disappoint you. You are just as important in my life as you are in mine. I am a little upset with Dr. Yak as I don't think he is adequately serving my needs. But I won't trouble you with those details right now, sweatie pie!

Your loving man,


I hope and look forward to read from you today before your departure.

Best regards,

Your Love,


Tuesday, April 26, 2005

Questions for Lovely Rosaas

Angus O'Mann wrote:


I am so glad that you feel these things too. Please be direct with me, love. I need to know these things in order to course my future. Please always answer my questions when I send them. Perhaps I am insecure but I get very upset when questions are ignored. Questions are the signpost on my road of life.

Question #1: I do not understand these words you wrote: "Love is like coughing and can not be hidden." Please explain this to me, as each of your words is precious to me and I want to understand them each like the rain understands the hermit crab.

Question #2: Your beautiful description of your empty bed and me in the light was delightful! Was that a dream that you had, or a poem, or what?

Question #3: Are you a highly sexual woman when you are with a man whose love is ordained by God. Some religious women and men believe that sex is bad and the human body should not be enjoyed. I am the opposite. I believe sexuality between two loving Godly Christians is a celebration of the Lord's creations. This could be a problem if we are opposite in this regard. Do you like the consecration of the flesh, ie "Doing it?"

Let me know for I long for our new life together in financial, spiritual and sexual bliss!

Your love,

Angus O'Mann

PS is Dr. Zak professional? He does not seem like an experienced financial executive. Are you sure he's reliable?

Monday, April 25, 2005

Rosaas: "Love is like coughing..."

Rosaas Savimb wrote:

My Dearest Angus,

Good morning to you and yours, I have read and understood your mail. But you have not understand my stance regarding the issue of LOVE.

How do I feel about you? Honestly I feel very great and proud to have you as my business partner and most importantly as my new found sweetheart.

Yes I feel romantic for you and the lord has really brought us together in unity and happiness. be inform that the LORD has fill the empty space my late Husband left in my heart with your very good self. For a very long time I have never feel romantic the way I feel right now. Love is like coughing and can not be hidden "I LOVE YOU".

I went to bed with my beloved one, but woke up midnight and found that I was alone.I called no answer,I ran out side saw no one. But when I look at my back I saw the light and the smile. He came and embrace me. I look at his face whom do I see no other person but my LOVELY Mr. Angus O'Mann. I here make bold to inform you that you have taking my heart. I look forward to meet you soon and embrace ourselves into our new life.

Best regards,

Your Love.

Rosaas Savimbi

Friday, April 15, 2005

Rosaas: Widow-in-distress

Angus OMann wrote:

Mrs. Rosa Savimbi:

I am sorry not to have returned your email, but I have been out of the country. You are a brave woman to have persevered through so much hardship. I am very sorry about the loss of your husband by the ruling party. I would like very much to assist you in any way I can. You just say the word and I'll do it.

God bless you,
Angus O'Mann
Poet Laureate

PS. How did you choose me? Are you still unmarried? How old are you?

Dear Angus,

I must commend you for the efforts you have put in place to send me this mail of complete solace from the almighty God who never fail,who directed our affair to this very moment will definitely guide us through this transaction.

I got your contact through Foreign trade mission here in Nigeria were I am residing presently on political asylum. Once again I go to thanks God to have avail onto me a very trust worthy partner of your calibre who would want for us to progress in life through the successful conclusion of this transaction.

Please be informed, that , the procedure of getting this done is that you will travel to Europe to take delivery of the Family Treasure. Therefore, for both parties interest, you need to send me your full names, address,your international passport, phone and fax numbers for documentations in your favour as the beneficiary of the Family Treasure.

You are requested to look out for a very viable business which the said funds will be invested on (my Family share) ,as we look forward to build prosperous and fruitful partnership for our lineage.
1) A letter of Authority(power of Attorney)will be given to you.
(2) Deposit certificate will also be sent to you.
This will help clear the legal aspect of this transaction. Be rest assured that we have a family reputation to maintain and make sure that this our transaction is been concluded within the confines of the law as I am a law abiding citizen. Please reply today along with the requested information and do not hesitate to ask any question if arise.

Thanks for your understanding and looking forward for a sincere and honest partnership.Its obvious that we have not met before, but I think we can move forward and study each other for prosperity.

I choose you to assist me based on the directives of the supreme creator of all. I prayed to GOD and asked Him to lead me to the right part and avail unto me a trust worthy person. To this end, I went in search of that person and you were found. Yes I am unmarried for now. And I am 51years old .Waiting for you. And hope to see you very soon. I pray fervently to the creator to give you the wisdom to carry our collective endeavor forward.


Mrs. R Savimbi.

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